I became very ill – on the verge of hospice – several years ago, and my family and I soon after fell upon excruciatingly difficult financial times. We fell behind on our rent. We spent down our savings and pensions. We did our best to reach out to the various tzedakos for help to catch up, but ultimately, we were served an eviction notice. We had no other family to assist us and nowhere we could go.

A close, widowed friend of ours who has a 4-bedroom house and finished basement (whose children had all married and were out of the house), told me and my family that she would never let us be homeless or on the street – that if it came to it, we could absolutely stay with her seeing as she was the only person in her house and that she had plenty of space.

For almost a year, as our case made its way through Housing Court, she repeatedly said we always had a home with her – that we didn’t need to worry. But when the Judge signed the eviction order, she balked and made excuses and closed her door to us. The time arrived for us to vacate before the Marshal came to lock us out. We told our friend the matzav, and she told us she had made a terrible mistake in offering us the option to stay with her until we recovered financially! She told us we should find a “supportive supervisor” at the Housing Court to give us more time in our apartment and that she would daven for us! There were only two of us, and she had an unbelievable amount of space! And she closed her doors to us even as I fought back death! What she did to us was so painful, it is indescribable.

I swore vengeance against her, that one day she would find herself in the same matzav or worse for what she had done to us. I planned to despise her all my days; to curse her with endless suffering all her days.

But ultimately, in the months after the eviction, we were zoche to such unbelievable nissim. It became clear that Hashem had orchestrated the entire eviction for us to bring us to an incredible new place physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Hashem was the only shelter we needed!

This friend reached out constantly at the yom tovim and birthdays to inform us of good news in her life that she thought would “cheer us up,” and
to tell us she was always davening for us. We ignored all of her messages and didn’t tell her where we now live. I finally decided to forgive her, and responded briefly to her most recent message saying we were Baruch Hashem, bili ayin hara, fine and wished her well. I thought I had forgiven her fully.

But after watching Letting Go, and hearing about sweet, pure Charlotte, I realized I hadn’t truly forgiven this woman. In the zechus of Charlotte, I have decided to fully forgive this woman for what she did to us. I know my grudge doesn’t serve me, and it only ties me to her! She was just the shaliach for Hashem and nothing more. I don’t want her back in my life, but I am releasing my anger toward her, and am forgiving her בלב שלם.

This one’s for you, Charlotte – Shaindel ע”ה bas Chaim Yehuda Leib! May your memory be a blessing for your family, Binny, and all of Klal Yisroel!
#ShalomforCharlotte